Tuesday, June 15, 2010

It's been a year...

Chad and I have always been close. Being the little sister of two older brothers kinda makes you close -- whether you want to or not. He’s always been very protective of his little sister, and I have always been very protective of him. I grew up with two older brothers, but Chad and I were closer in age. So, that made my oldest brother Rob, even more protective, I think. Rob wanted nothing but the best for his little sister, and he made sure of it – no matter how many miles away he was. I love both my brothers with all my heart. I am the person I am because of them.


Chad moved to Lubbock in January of 2001. I love to tell everyone he moved there because me, but it was really because of a girl. He and I were both in relationships, but we made sure our relationship between each other stayed strong. He broke up with his girl, I broke up with my guy, and we became inseparable. He went through some serious hardships, and so did I. We grew up. Together, yet separate. I moved back to Dallas, he stayed in Lubbock. I didn’t trust many – I should really say any - of his friends, but after a while, I did finally come around to trust his best friend, Justin Blake Johnson. I hated him at the beginning, I mean, seriously hated him – but he won me over in the end. Maybe it was his charm, but Justin did promised me - up, down, left and right that Chad was ok. I believed him – and I knew Chad was doing right finally. I had always been Chad’s last resort, last call - and I gave it up to Justin, and I’m so glad I did.


Jon and I were putting up pictures around Christmas, and I came across a picture of Justin, Chad and I. We were at my favorite bar in Lubbock – they met me at Blue Light, I guess I was trying to relive my college memories at the time in 2005, but they were both there -- for me.


Justin passed away a year ago today. I'll never forget the phone call Jon got from Mom -- she knows me too well to not give me that news over the phone, and wanted to make sure Jon was with me when I got it. I immediately went into panic mode. How is Chad? Where is he? I need to get to him. NOW. I need to give him a hug. I need to see his face and make sure he's ok. WHY isn't he answering his phone?? My friend Leigh Ann and I left for Lubbock that next afternoon. I didn't know how long I'd be there -- I needed to be by Chad's side and give him a hug. I needed to make sure he was ok. We made it through the week together. Laughing with everybody, crying with everybody. We all got through it together.


Chad is doing better these days. He and his girlfriend, Ashton, are expecting a baby boy in July, and they both are thrilled. They are naming the baby after Justin and my Dad -- Thomas Blake. I absolutely love it.


 I think Justin and the man upstairs played a little part with Chad meeting a good girl and helping him heal. It's good to see a smile and life fill Chad's face and eyes. I missed that spark -- and it's back! I know there isn't a day that goes by that Chad doesn't think about Justin -- I just hope it's with a lighter, healing heart. Justin is resting in peace, and I think Chad is on his way.


That picture remains on our fridge and I get to see Justin and Chad everyday.